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Tuesday, December 06, 2005

It's 11:30pm and I cannot bring myself to fall asleep. The ticking of my alarm clock accompanies me tonight, and the clicking of this laptop keyboard as I type.

I laid in bed, tossed and turned thinking and thinking as melancholy wrapped thickly to my soul like a heavy blanket. All I could hear on the other end of the phone line was the tone engagement, and indecipherable language that perhaps tells me the person on the other end of the line has switched his mobile off. I lay there not knowing what to think, but the accompanying numbness and annoying perpetual alertness.

There is no one I can call now, they are likely to be in their blissful slumber back home. I miss having someone here with me. God my throat hurts, it’s so much harder to be positive and think straight when you are sick. God I miss him. What have I learnt? When you keep busy, you don't
feel lonely, but when you stop, it hits you like a brick wall.

We both went clubbing last weekend. We both had fun, separately with other people. Guilt
Confusion
Frustration
I procrastinated hours on the internet searching for anecdote on the so called LDR.

Ultimately I know, the answer lies somewhere within myself.

xiao ying @ 2:31 AM.

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